I recently finished reading “Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself” by Kristin Neff and it brought me a lot of hope.
I have spent way too much time beating myself up over a variety of things and sitting in feelings of guilt and shame for way too long. Neff assures us there’s a better way.
Choosing to be kind to ourselves through encouraging self talk and self care has endless benefits for our mental and physical health. And it simply feels better than judging ourselves harshly. I like the idea that we should be talking to ourselves the way we would talk to a good friend or a child. With love, understanding and compassion.
This concept resonates with me since so much suffering is caused by our own doing and the way we perceive situations and our role in it. Most people I know can relate to the inner dialogue critiquing our every move.
If you’re looking for an opportunity to improve the relationship you have with yourself, I recommend this book. It combines mindfulness with the science of self-compassion for a comprehensive “how to” on being kinder to ourselves for a more peaceful and joyful life. You can purchase it here.
Below are a few of my favorite quotes from “Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself” by Kristin Neff:
“This is a moment of suffering. Suffering is part of life. May I be kind to myself in this moment. May I give myself the compassion I need.”
“Try to feel compassion for how difficult it is to be an imperfect human being in this extremely competitive society of ours. Our culture does not emphasize self-compassion, quite the opposite. We’re told that no matter how hard we try, our best just isn’t good enough.”
“Our emotional suffering is caused by our desire for things to be other than they are. The more we resist the fact of what is happening right now, the more we suffer. Pain is like a gaseous substance. If you allow it to just be there, freely, it will eventually dissipate on its own. If you fight and resist the pain, however, walling it into a confined space, the pressure will grow and grow until there is an explosion.”
“By giving ourselves unconditional kindness and comfort while embracing the human experience, difficult as it is, we avoid destructive patterns of fear, negativity, and isolation.”